Online dating has grown from a marginalized and stigmatized hobby to a $2 billion industry. Over 40 million Americans have tried online dating, and over a third of married couples in the United States met online between 2005 and 2012.
Match.com, which established in 1995, was the first major online dating site. eHarmony was founded in 2000, OkCupid in 2004, and, more recently, a slew of mobile people-swiping apps such as Tinder and Hinge have exploded in popularity.
Is this, however, a good thing or something to be concerned about? Is internet dating making the world a better place and making dating more effective, or is it causing something important to be lost or sacrificed as a result? What will dating be like in 2030, and will it be a better or worse time to be on the dating market than 1995, given the current trend? What might dating in 2030 look like in an ideal world?
Tim’s Response: This is a no-brainer beneficial development in my opinion. It’s important to note that this isn’t online dating, but rather internet meeting individuals followed by in-person dating. I believe that the word “online dating” contributes to the problem by leading those who are unfamiliar with it to believe that it refers to people who develop whole relationships online before meeting in person.
It makes a lot of sense if you just think of it as online meeting people. I’ve previously made my case in two posts: one on how important it is to find the appropriate life partner and how seriously we should take that search, and another on why going to bars is a bad way to spend your time. Meeting the right person is the first step toward finding the perfect person, and we’ve had no real mechanism for doing it swiftly and wisely for something so crucial in our lives. Trying to meet a stranger in public is a nightmare for socially awkward, anxious, or shy people, and even for someone charming and outgoing, it’s a tedious effort that requires a lot of luck. The other option is to meet someone through friends, which can work, but it limits you to single people you know through your closest friends and family.
Effective dating must take place in person, just as your grandfather did, but I see no reason why meeting individuals to date can’t be methodical and efficient in the first place. Yes, there’s something special about meeting someone in public and hitting it off right away, but that rarely happens—and for the most important mission in most of our lives, crushing your ability to meet great people to try a first date with because you met them online isn’t as good a story doesn’t make sense. My guy goes on two or three first dates a week with people he already knows could be good personality and physical matches for him—how that’s you find the right person, and good luck keeping up with him meeting people the old-fashioned way. And what about those who aren’t interested in serious relationships and just want to hook up? There’s also a lot better way to do it online.
In terms of present online dating alternatives, I think they’re a good first try by humanity, but it’s the kind of thing we’ll considerably improve on in the next years, to the point where the way it was done in 2014 would appear archaic in a matter of years. Now that the stigma has faded, you can be sure that this business will accelerate because there is so much money to be gained by those who can be creative. So, in 2030, I believe we’ll be somewhere quite different, and today’s nine-year-olds will have amazing opportunities to discover love when they’re 25. Maybe I’ll be a future obstinate old man when it comes to dating in person, but I believe it should stay that way, and the industry’s innovation should focus more and more on optimizing the process of getting the precise perfect individuals on first dates with one other—what that’s it’s for.