Online dating can be tricky, and it’s not uncommon for guys to mess things up before they get it right. In fact, a recent survey found that 66% of online daters have made an embarrassing mistake during their dating profile.
Even popular online dating profiles sites like OkCupid reveal that some men make some not-so-flattering mistakes when trying to woo women. Scared of making the same mistakes as other guys?
Don’t be! We’ve got you covered with the 10 deadly online dating mistakes that guys make and how you can avoid them.
Online dating can either be your best chance at meeting someone new, or an exercise in frustration. How you approach it makes a big difference. If you’re like most guys, your first few forays into online dating probably ended with little more than a handful of awkward dates and frustrated ghosting on your end.
It’s not hard to see why: as with any other kind of dating, there are some traps that men tend to fall into when pursuing women online. Mistakes that make you look desperate, overly eager, or just plain weird—and make you seem like the kind of guy that other women are likely to avoid at all costs.
The good news is that these mistakes are pretty easy to fix once you know what they are and why they matter so much.
Online dating can be an intimidating experience for anyone. Even if you think you know what you’re doing, there are so many ways to mess it up and scare off potential matches. The trick is knowing how not to scare them off!
Fortunately, we have lots of helpful advice from other users about what doesn’t work for them when they’re being matched with new people through an online dating service. Men in particular seem to struggle with these pitfalls, but all users will benefit from reading our expert advice on how not to scare them off with your online dating profile.
1. Try To Be Someone You’re Not
Let’s get one thing straight: you can’t be everything to everyone. Even if you could, it would be way too exhausting! Instead, you want to be yourself. However, trying to be someone you’re not is one of the biggest mistakes that guys make on their dating profiles.
You don’t want to pretend to be a professional athlete or try to be super-successful if you’re not. Not only is it false, but it can backfire big time. It’s fine to mention what you do for a living, but don’t try to be someone you aren’t. Not only will it be obvious, but your date will probably be able to tell that something isn’t right.
2. Don’t Show Your Face
No matter what type of dating site you’re on, it’s generally a good idea to show your face. We get that some guys might be nervous about their appearance, but the best thing you can do is go ahead and be open about it.
If you don’t show your face, a potential date may assume that you’re hiding something and/or they may be put off by the lack of honesty. On some sites, you may have the option to have your photo be only visible to the person you’re messaging with.
This is a much better way of handling your photos if you’re shy about how you look. Another reason that you may not want to show your face is if you’re using an online dating site for a different type of relationship.
3. Write About Yourself Like You’re Advertising
Some guys take the whole “write about yourself like you’re an advertisment” thing a little too literally. They make it seem like they’re trying to sell themselves instead of finding a way to express their interests, personality, and what they’re looking for in a relationship.
While it’s nice to include a few positive traits about yourself, try not to go overboard. You don’t want to come across as bragging. Instead, you want to write something that shows your potential date who you are and what you’re interested in.
Also read: 19 Tips For Online Dating Success: A Guy’s Perspective
It’s important that you don’t come off as too casual or informal. You want to come across as mature and thoughtful, but not too serious.
4. Be Too Casual
If you’re an extrovert, you might want to be careful not to come off as too casual. If you write something like, “Hey ladies, looking for a good time,” it’s going to turn off most women.
Come across more like a friend than a casual hookup. Also, be careful not to take a casual approach when messaging a person on a dating site. It may seem like a casual conversation, but a potential date may think that you’re too casual. Be careful not to come across as too casual.
5. Show Only One Photo
Some people like to have a photo of themselves as a child or a photo of their dog. Although cute and sentimental, it’s not as great for an online dating profile. A photo of you looking your best (but not trying too hard) is what you want to show.
Just one photo is plenty. You may be tempted to show a photo of yourself doing an exciting activity, but it’s better to show a photo of yourself looking your best. A great photo will do more for your profile than 10 photos combined.
6. Don’t Be a Stalker
You may really like a girl and want to get to know her, but you don’t want to come across as a stalker. Don’t follow her around on all the dating sites she’s on, don’t message her every day, and don’t message her more than once in a day.
Give her a little space and come across as friendly and interesting, but not clingy. It’s better to be patient and wait until she contacts you if you want to get to know her better.
7. Don’t Write A Bio That Sounds Like A Resume
You’ve got the perfect job and have lived in some amazing places. It’s great to share a little bit about your life, but try not to come across like you’re writing a resume. Don’t include your education, job, or where you’ve lived.
You want to be interesting and show that you’re a cool person, but don’t come across like you’re trying to sell yourself. Be careful not to come across as too serious. Be a bit lighthearted and don’t be afraid to show off your personality.
8. Don’t be afraid to show off your personality.
It’s great to be confident, but don’t come off as too cocky. Nobody likes a bragger, and it can hurt your chances of meeting someone great. You want to be confident without bragging or coming across as arrogant.
9. Don’t give up too soon.
Even if you don’t find the love of your life on the first site you join, don’t give up too soon. You may want to try a few different sites and wait a few months before deciding that online dating isn’t for you. Give yourself time to get used to the sites and figure out what works best for you and what doesn’t.
10. Don’t forget to include your height and weight.
Some people care more about their partner’s height and weight than others, but you don’t want to come across as inconsiderate if you don’t include it. Include your height and weight even if you don’t think it’s important.
Being online open to new relationships, but it is important to know how to navigate the online dating market. With these tips, you can pick up more than a few tricks of the trade.